Pull It Apart. Put It Together.

Pull it apart. Put it together. Pull it apart. Put it together.

The first thing that hits me is the smell. Pancakes, sausages, bacon, eggs, coffee. My eyes open slowly letting in a world of light. Fuzzy lines turn solid showing me the outlines of chairs and tables. The diner is full of people, most without faces.

“Elaine! I told you no sleeping on the job!” my boss says near me, but I have no idea how he is, he doesn’t have a mouth to speak with, just his angry looking eyes remain on his face.

“Sorry, sir. Won’t happen again.”

Boss man walks away grumbling. I get up off a stool and grab some person’s food. I set the plates down on table number three. Two teenagers sit at the table. The boy has a large toothy smile, but no eyes or nose; the girl has no face at all, but her dress seems more vivid and colorful than the rest of her. Bright paisley patterns flow around and around the dress.

“Thanks,” The girl says like she just came from a dream.

“Your Welcome,” I say and walk off to another table to take their order.

Morning shift is over before I can blink and I head home. A feeling of dread takes hold of me as I get closer. I don’t want to go home, I know whatever is on the other side is not good. I slow down the buggy so I can delay whatever is at home. Whatever it is can’t be good. The duplex stands among the other duplexes in the neighborhood. I let myself in through the left door and into the living room. Everything here is washed and gray. Some color splashes certain things like the faded green blanket on the couch, the multicolored yarn in the basket on the table. I hear scuffling upstairs from the bedroom. Immediately butterflies skitter through my stomach. I climb the stairs, creaks come with each foot fall. To the left is the door to the bedroom. The door is cracked open a little bit, so I push it open.

A man is sitting there on the bed, duffle bags spilling over with clothes. He has golden hair and a button nose, his eyes are covered by his hands. I sit down on the bed next to him and put my arm around his shoulder, trying to make the man feel better. He uncovers his eyes with his hands, but his eyes remain shut. We both sit in silence for awhile.

“You don’t have to go, Tom. Run away with me. We’ll move somewhere out of country, so you won’t have to fight.” I finally say.

“Yes I do, you know I do.”

“No you don’t, Scarecrow.”

“Please, just let me go. It’ll be easier.” He looks at me. I see his eyes. They are red rimmed, but the blue is so vivid, like the ocean.

“I can’t do that. I love you.” He doesn’t say anything. He pulls something out of one of the bags and hands it to me.

“It’s a small Scarecrow, for when I’m gone.”

Pull it apart. Put it together. Pull it apart. Put it together.

Birds chirping. Sunlight streams through the leaves of the large oak tree and hits my face. I want to climb this tree. It’s perfect. All the branches are low enough for me to get my hands and feet on and when I get up there I’ll be able to see for miles. Maybe it’ll be so tall I’ll be able to go to the moon, Yeah.

I start to climb the tree. Gnarled limbs twisting and turning like the yellow brick road. I am wearing my pretty white and blue dress. I’ll pretend to be Dorothy until I get to the top. The branches turn yellow in the sunlight. My foot slips and for a brief second I thought I would fall. I grab the tree trunk frantically and hold myself there for awhile. I can’t die, I’m Dorothy, I’m supposed to go to the Emerald City.

“Hey!” I look down and see a boy with a button nose and blue eyes like the Scarecrows and straw blonde hair. But he doesn’t look like he’s ready to play like the Scarecrow though. “What are you doing!”

“I’m going to the Emerald City, Scarecrow!” I yell down at him. “Want to come with me!”

“No! And stop calling me scarecrow!”

“Fine, but you won’t get your brain if you don’t!” I tease.

“Mama says I have a really smart brain!” He yells back.

“Oh just come on up!”He sighs and starts climbing too. Soon enough he’s right by my side.

“Now we can go see the Wizard!”

He climbs with me up and up the mountain. We play around and giggle hysterically. You know what, I want him to be my best friend, he’s fun and makes me laugh. We reach the top of the tree and we’re able to see miles in every direction, but there is nothing, it’s only gray. He puts down a green blanket he’s been carrying and we sit on one of the branches.

“Hey, you wanna be my best friends forever Scarecrow.” He kinda smells like wheat too!

“What?”

“You heard me Scarecrow!”

“Yes, I will be your best friend forever and for all eternity.” He giggles and rolls his eyes. They’re more like the blue of the ocean than the Scarecrow’s blue.

“Pinky swear?”

“Pinky swear.”

Pull it apart. Put it together. Pull it apart. Put it together.

Laughing fills me ears. The kids are running around the yard outside. I’m standing in a bluish gray kitchen the waters running while red-ish tomatoes are being strained. The sauce on the stove just needs these tomatoes and dinner will be ready soon.

“Mommy, when is daddy gonna get home?” I turn around and see the youngest kid standing behind me with a ratty old green blanket handed down to him by his father.

“I don’t know Sam, probably very soon.”As if on cue the front door opens and in steps a man. Graying blonde hair, button nose, and ocean blue eyes and all.

“Hello little monster,” he says and picks up the little one swirling him around while both of them laughed and places him on the ground again. “Boy, I’m getting old,” he says as he grabs his back.

“Hey, honey,” he steps past the little one and kisses me.

“Hey, Scarecrow.”

“Still with the Scarecrow?”

“Of course,” I tease.

I add the tomatoes to the inky sauce. Wheat straws stand in a vase next to the stove for when I make pasta; the vase is half empty.

Pull it apart. Put it together. Pull it apart. Put it together. Elaine sits in a chair at a table. A green blanket is wrapped around her shoulders. The house is warm and humid with the summer heat. Sam sits at the table next to her, where his father used to sit. She is disassembling and reassembling a little scarecrow doll. Taking out the wheat, putting the wheat back in.

“Promise me we’ll be best friends forever Scarecrow,” Elaine says to the scarecrow shaking in her hands.

“Mom, mom. Listen to me. I’m right here. Just talk to me,” Sam says frantically.

“We’ll run away, you and me, so you won’t have to go.”

“Mom, please, I’m right here. Just talk to me.”

“Scarecrow, please don’t leave me.”

“I won’t leave you, I would never leave,” tears stream down Sams face. He doesn’t want to give up on her, but she’s already too far gone.